It has been a year since my last post and it has taken the imminence of a huge change in my life to jolt me out of hibernation. Yes, I will be graduating again and this time I am not joining another school... Life will not revolve around school anymore..
Whenever faced with something big, something life changing, there is a specific moment when I truly and completely become aware of the magnitude of the change. The associated anxiety just hits and overwhelms me suddenly. I have been planning for life after school for some time - applied for jobs, OPT, H1B etc etc but never really realized the implications of this.. Today I did.. Today was my last chance to sit in a lecture for a certain course and work on a homework for a different course. Tomorrow is perhaps my last chance to sleep thru a lecture. This is the last week when I can wake up at noon and still be in time to start my day. These are the last few days in which the objective of my daily routine is just to 'learn'. I realized today how essential the role of an educational institution has been in my daily life. Since I can remember, life has revolved around school and education. It will no more.
Am I ready for this? I dont know... What is the goal of my life now? I dont know... It was very clear until now - I had to study hard and get good marks in 10th standard so that I join a reputed junior college.. I had to get great grades in 12th to join a good engineering college and so on.. What must I do now? Life has never been so open before. There have been decisions to make in the past but someone always took them for me or atleast influenced me strongly enough. Now, I must choose the path myself.
Well, change is inevitable, life moves on and so will I. The best thing about life in an educational setting is that no matter what, you have to keep learning. That is one attribute I surely want to carry with me to this next phase of life. I must keep learning, I must keep evolving!
April 30, 2008
April 16, 2007
Are you lonely?
I have always sympathized with people in lonely conditions or situations. I have always felt that depression is the worst disease. I have always said a silent prayer for someone who I feel is lonely whether I know him/her or not...
Now, I am thinking again.. It was one of those afternoons when I was making up for a sleepless night spent doing homework. I could not sleep soundly and when I woke up my mind was a senseless muddle of thoughts. It often happens when one sleeps abnormally..
And just out of the blue (or maybe it was in connection with something I dreamt), a question struck me: Am I Lonely??? And the first answer I got was: YES! perhaps I am..... possibly, we all are... After all, who else can think your thoughts? Who else can feel your emotions? Who else can understand all your actions? Who else can feel your pain? Who else can experience your happiness? Who else in this world can be even remotely close to what you are.. the life you are living..
There are people who are "acquainted" with different but incomplete aspects of our lives.. The conversations we have with them are just a few manifestations of the zillions of thoughts that crop up in our mind everyday.. We hang out in groups but we are all centers of our own universes.. The fortunate or unfortunate truth is that we are all very lonely..
Now, I am thinking again.. It was one of those afternoons when I was making up for a sleepless night spent doing homework. I could not sleep soundly and when I woke up my mind was a senseless muddle of thoughts. It often happens when one sleeps abnormally..
And just out of the blue (or maybe it was in connection with something I dreamt), a question struck me: Am I Lonely??? And the first answer I got was: YES! perhaps I am..... possibly, we all are... After all, who else can think your thoughts? Who else can feel your emotions? Who else can understand all your actions? Who else can feel your pain? Who else can experience your happiness? Who else in this world can be even remotely close to what you are.. the life you are living..
There are people who are "acquainted" with different but incomplete aspects of our lives.. The conversations we have with them are just a few manifestations of the zillions of thoughts that crop up in our mind everyday.. We hang out in groups but we are all centers of our own universes.. The fortunate or unfortunate truth is that we are all very lonely..
April 13, 2007
Seasons and Changes
This is from a forwarded email. But, the moral of this story is something I feel very strongly about!
The following pics are of the same place but taken under different seasons!! Scroll down for the story..
There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge
things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.
The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.
When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen
The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise.
The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.
The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.
The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.
He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.
If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall.
The following pics are of the same place but taken under different seasons!! Scroll down for the story..
There was a man who had four sons. He wanted his sons to learn not to judge
things too quickly. So he sent them each on a quest, in turn, to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.
The first son went in the winter, the second in the spring, the third in summer, and the youngest son in the fall.
When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen
The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted. The second son said no it was covered with green buds and full of promise.
The third son disagreed; he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.
The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.
The man then explained to his sons that they were all right, because they had each seen but only one season in the tree's life.
He told them that you cannot judge a tree, or a person, by only one season, and that the essence of who they are and the pleasure, joy, and love that come from that life can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons are up.
If you give up when it's winter, you will miss the promise of your spring, the beauty of your summer, fulfillment of your fall.
February 12, 2007
Importance of your display pic
I observed something really interesting today... I have 10-15 orkut profile visitors on an average day. On the eventful day of 02/11/07 (when I changed my orkut display pic), I had 113 visitors!!! 30-40 visitors is alright but 113 just due to a new pic?!?!? Anyways, lesson learned: If you want people to visit your profile, change your display pic.. :P
January 20, 2007
Crash!!
Today, I saw the most amazing movie - Crash which actually compelled me to resume blogging. Highly recommended by most of my friends, I expected the movie to be good. But I did not expect it to be so intense and thought-provoking!
I will not talk much about the plot since it is one of those movies where the less you know the more you enjoy. But there is something I learned from this movie - Never be too quick to judge people. We observe their actions and its repurcussions from a distance and try to judge them(people). We forget that we see only that which is visible from our position and it is never the complete picture. Possibly, our view is also blurred by our own prejudices. We do not know what events and circumstances led to someone's behaviour. And hence, I believe it is wrong to judge a person simply from isolated incidents. We must keep our mind open to all possibilities without being judgemental! Under any circumstance, only the doer himself knows what exactly led to his behaviour.
Anyways, even if I dont make any sense, this movie is a MUST watch! If you havnt seen it already please do so at the first possible opportunity and let me know how you like it..
I will not talk much about the plot since it is one of those movies where the less you know the more you enjoy. But there is something I learned from this movie - Never be too quick to judge people. We observe their actions and its repurcussions from a distance and try to judge them(people). We forget that we see only that which is visible from our position and it is never the complete picture. Possibly, our view is also blurred by our own prejudices. We do not know what events and circumstances led to someone's behaviour. And hence, I believe it is wrong to judge a person simply from isolated incidents. We must keep our mind open to all possibilities without being judgemental! Under any circumstance, only the doer himself knows what exactly led to his behaviour.
Anyways, even if I dont make any sense, this movie is a MUST watch! If you havnt seen it already please do so at the first possible opportunity and let me know how you like it..
October 31, 2006
Blessing in Disguise
There was a time when I used to think most events in life are curses in disguise. They lure you with the promise of happiness but never give you enough and sometimes just result in the opposite.
Well, recently some events have changed my viewpoint. And ironically this has happened when faced with testing circumstances. I am beginning to feel that Life itself is a Blessing in Disguise. The disguise being this world of illusion (maya). We go through ups and downs, lows and highs but each event, each problem teaches us something new, makes us stronger. This experience and strength will stay with us forever while such events keep coming and going with time. On hindsight, we realize that the learning experience through such testing periods is much more enriching than the temporal pain or discomfort we have to face.
Whenever we come across a problem, if we take it as a challenge, an opportunity to improve, treat it as a blessing in disguise, not only will the complementary discomforts appear minor and manageable but we should be able to handle the problem better!
Well, recently some events have changed my viewpoint. And ironically this has happened when faced with testing circumstances. I am beginning to feel that Life itself is a Blessing in Disguise. The disguise being this world of illusion (maya). We go through ups and downs, lows and highs but each event, each problem teaches us something new, makes us stronger. This experience and strength will stay with us forever while such events keep coming and going with time. On hindsight, we realize that the learning experience through such testing periods is much more enriching than the temporal pain or discomfort we have to face.
Whenever we come across a problem, if we take it as a challenge, an opportunity to improve, treat it as a blessing in disguise, not only will the complementary discomforts appear minor and manageable but we should be able to handle the problem better!
October 14, 2006
Is Ignorance Bliss?
When I was about 10 yrs old, the following was asked in the question-answer round of some international beauty pageant:
"Ignorance is Bliss" but "Knowledge is Power". How do you reconcile the two?
Various answers were put forth by the contestants like -
- They are two sides of the same coin
- In some cases you must be ignorant sometimes knowledge is more useful
- You should be ignorant about the bad/negative things
and so on...
Somehow none of these answers seemed convincing to me. And every now and then I have been perplexed wondering about the conflict between these two proverbs. I began to feel the proverb 'Ignorance is Bliss' is incomplete. Well, recently, I got my answer - the second half of this adage.
I came across the following words by Sri Sri Ravishankar on a forum:
"
Knowledge is a burden if it robs you of innocence
Knowledge is a burden if it makes you feel you are special
Knowledge is a burden if it gives you an idea that you are wise
Knowledge is a burden if it is not integrated into life
Knowledge is a burden if it does not bring you joy
Knowledge is a burden if it does not set you free
"
During my first read I could only appreciate the beauty and veracity of these words. And a second thought gave me my answer.
"Ignorance is Bliss when Knowledge is a Burden"
So simple yet so subtle....
"Ignorance is Bliss" but "Knowledge is Power". How do you reconcile the two?
Various answers were put forth by the contestants like -
- They are two sides of the same coin
- In some cases you must be ignorant sometimes knowledge is more useful
- You should be ignorant about the bad/negative things
and so on...
Somehow none of these answers seemed convincing to me. And every now and then I have been perplexed wondering about the conflict between these two proverbs. I began to feel the proverb 'Ignorance is Bliss' is incomplete. Well, recently, I got my answer - the second half of this adage.
I came across the following words by Sri Sri Ravishankar on a forum:
"
Knowledge is a burden if it robs you of innocence
Knowledge is a burden if it makes you feel you are special
Knowledge is a burden if it gives you an idea that you are wise
Knowledge is a burden if it is not integrated into life
Knowledge is a burden if it does not bring you joy
Knowledge is a burden if it does not set you free
"
During my first read I could only appreciate the beauty and veracity of these words. And a second thought gave me my answer.
"Ignorance is Bliss when Knowledge is a Burden"
So simple yet so subtle....
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